Mad Bob

Mugabe a mad man indeed, By Rudzani Floyd Musekwa

So, everybody has been talking about the Zimbabwean situation, intellectuals, academics, scholars (hopefully I am not repeating the same thing here, it is possible), and also politicians, and those who were not good enough to be politicians who today call themselves independent political analysts (by the way, these are just unemployed, and usually uneployable males older than 50).

And there are also those old people who used to be journalists who have now since come out of retirement to utter a word or two about the most famous politician of the 21st century, i.e., Robert Gabriel Mugabe, forget Nelson Mandela, our Madiba, he is just famous because he drinks with Hollywood superstars, laugh out loud).

While Mandela's resume boasts of things like that 27 years in jail, my wonderful Uncle Bobby boasts of a whopping 28 years in power, even when the great Joshua Nkomo was still alive. And the two do have things in common, you know, Mandela celebrates his birthdays with people like broadcast legend Oprah Winfrey, Sir Richard Branson, Bono, Will Smith and many others like Amy Winehouse (a very famous artist who depends on steroids), and people like British model, Naomi Campbell.

Robert, on the other hand, will never be seen in the company of such people, or maybe they will never be around him. Mugabe's birthdays are bashes that take place for days in that country, even when the people are struggling to eat at all.

Mugabe and Mandela were at a stalemate until I remembered something very important that I learned a long-time ago in my media studies class at varsity, and that is that no news is bad news, and since it is public knowledge that Mugabe wins that one then there is no need to declare the winner here.

Now back to the commentators who make Mugabe even more prominent. These guys like Moeletsi Mbeki, Steven Friedman, Aubrey Matshiqi and others should just find something else to talk about instead of trying to come up with solutions for Zimbabwe. Maybe they should talk about something like how our wonderful government is capable of making the Chinese people of the world black, and spending state resources on court cases like the one currently taking place when we know that the accused are criminals.

The situation in Zimbabwe is getting even worse because the commentators are making it a theoretic issue. People are busy blaming Mbeki for his style or lack of, when it comes to mediation in that country. In his letter to the editor of the Cape Times on Wednesday July 09th, Bonginkosi Madikizela says it very well, and I assumed he was fuming when he wrote it, and I quote, 'It's time for tougher actions against Mugabe.' Oh well my friend, it's every body's dream for that to happen, even Thabo Mbeki's, but the poor little man of the African Renaissance does not know how.

Instead of interviewing intellectuals about the Zim issue we should rather have militants who will share information of how to topple that man. The only solution to the Zim situation is not to negotiate with him; he is 86 years thicker, very hardened. You cannot convince Mugabe in 2008 when you failed to do so when he first showed the glimpses of being the mad Uncle Bob we are all accustomed to today.

Having Mbeki going to meet Mugabe and Morgan 'The British Toy boy' Tsvangirai was a mistake that I am thankful Tsvangirai got cold feet and switched off his mobile phone when Mbeki was that side. As the Tsvangirai brain train so rightfully suspected, Mbeki chose the day that he happened to be going to Japan to meet the so called G8, an opportunity for cute leaders like Nikolas 'Pants off' Sarkozy and others to show off.

The cute 8, as I shall refer to the toothless good guys, believe what Mbeki tells them, because they are great buddies, they drink together when they are not being forced to smile for the cameras or fake their concern about the Zim situation. To solve Mugabe is to force him out of office, and that means he must not have much choice about the matter since that will not work at all. I am just so tired of hearing the so called intellectuals and journalists talk of how illegal the runoff election was in the first place - that is not the question here.

The people of Zimbabwe are not waiting for the results of the legality of the runoff, they are leaving that country with little children on their backs and risking their lives, and who accounts to that, no one. The intellectuals are talking all this hogwash from spacious offices and they are just competing with each other, and they repeat themselves over this so called illegal election.
The fact that Mugabe was gutsy enough to stop the NGO's from distributing food when that country needed food more than any other country in the world showed how little respect he has for the international community and everybody who feels affected by what happens to the people of Zimbabwe.

So, do we need any mediation skills when Mugabe is kicking food away when his people need it? No, I don't think so because more than just a show of concern towards the people of Zimbabwe it was just to see if he would allow it. And that was to incite Zimbabwean people if you look at it critically. It's not like the Zimbabwean situation just started now, but where was that kind of help hiding?

While it is obvious that things have gone really bad in Zimbabwe in the past couple of years it is also important that we look further and deeper than the physical eye can go. Mugabe has done the continent a disservice, and it is because of him that Zimbabwe might never recover fully, but we also have to look at those who prefer certain leaders, and see what is in it for them, maybe we will find answers in a few years time, but it might not be good at all.